Nana

Before I begin my critique I should point out that I judge every piece as if I were walking through a virtual museum so, although I do my best to place the piece it whatever context is intended, my background is fine art and my view points come from that arena.
'Vision' is an inconveniently vague concept; I consider it to include wither a work's composition or it's artistic elaboration (how much an artist has manipulated a reference or source image), or sometimes, if appropriate, both. Lately, I have been utilizing its duality because, where a piece may be lacking in one, it makes up for in the other. In the case of composition I believe this piece could have been cropped closer to the figure. Additionally, I find the characters being crammed into the space above her head distracting. Had they been sketched out neatly and measured to share the space with the figure then I would have considered them part of the composition and less of an afterthought. In terms of artistic elaboration, this piece is fan art of a series I am wholly unfamiliar with: I do not know if anything was improved or not.
It is difficult to judge the originality of fan art but, if the figure in question is portrayed as the character the artist attempted to capture then it has been successful. In this case, this piece portrays the likeness of an anime character and, without knowing the series, I'm going to assume the artist has, in fact, captured that character so my score is neutral. For a work of fan art to score higher in 'Originality' then neutral, for me, the artist must do something to express their unique style through their subject matter.
I should point out that I DO NOT critique sketches. If anywhere in the work's title, description, or category 'sketching' is indicated, I will not comment on it because 'sketching' indicates it is an unfinished drawing. Since this piece was described as a 'drawing', I will proceed to critique it as a finished drawing.
In regards to 'Technique', the artist has shown a decent understanding of values including highlights, middle values, and shadow but there seems to be no particular style. The shading is uneven and the direction of the strokes do not provide any indication of contour. Additionally, the figure's face is devoid of any values but, in this case, that might be a trait of this character.
In regards to 'Impact' I consider how powerful the overall image is to me and, in this case, I do not find anything significantly impactful. The pose is nice (and anatomically accurate) but my biggest issue and the one I find most detrimental to this piece is how dark it is. Unless this piece was drawn on toned paper, the highlights should be significantly brighter (and if this piece was drawn on toned paper then the shadows should be significantly darker to compensate).
It should be noted that this is a very nice sketch of an existing anime character but none of the DA ratings take into account the 'accuracy' of fan art.